Why are you so hardcore?
Becuase I was caught not flushing the urinal.
Why do you smell like a ’74 Chevy Nova?
Because I have anal retentive OCD tendencies.
Why do you always look so stylish?
Because I’m cold & tired & still amused.
Why are you such an awesome bowler?
‘Cuz my sense of humor is totally off.
Why do you do that voodoo that you do?
Because I’m a Pieces.
Why do you have such an effeminate lip-ring?
Because I need a hair cut.
Why do you always wear a hat?
Because my ham is sweet and juicy.
Why do you touch butts?
Because the seat of my bike was stolen… once.
Why do you run in circles?
Because I refuse to eat seafood… for farcically moral reasons.
Why are you such a totally awesome writer?
Because I have to pee; but I know I won’t enjoy it as much as I would if I had a penis.
Why are you talking about this?
Because I don’t sleep very much – never have.
Why did your mama let you out of the house wearing that?
Because my cat sounds like Sean Connery.
I don’t have anything of interest to add to this. It was penned the day before Valentine’s Day of this year; I don’t know if that will help to explain it. Please bear in mind that each writer was answering a question they had not seen. That it flows so smooth is a matter of coincidence and a testament to the beautiful nature of our chaotic universe. Or something.
-BRP
Coffee Night 
That’s the best thing since sliced ice cream.
i think i’m almost in love.
i want to slip deep inside of her… spaghetti… and slurp up the last noodle with Parmesan cheese and tomato sauce.
-drool-